Dull Haiku

A selection from Twitter chosen by @lozarithm

Dull Haiku became a trending topic on Twitter around the beginning of 2010. 
The idea is believed to have been originated by Dan Rebellato. 
All the examples here included the hashtag #dullhaiku when submitted to Twitter by their author.

 

@Al_Ewing

hmm, too much coleslaw
more than i can really eat
quite a conundrum

 

@Al_Ewing

come on, everyone
let's brainstorm a solution
think outside the box

@Akadan75

Stand at the bus stop
Bloody thing went right past me
Wait for the next one

 

@Boolbar

No bus, no bus, rain
no bus no bus no bus rain
Here are two at once!

@CulturalSnow

Oh look. It's that bloke.
From that thing. On the telly.
No, wait. It's not him

 

@curlybex 

Looked out window, 
rain was wetly falling,
got my umbrella

@DanRebellato

I thought I saw Prince
Sitting in Pret-A-Manger
But it wasn't him

 

@davedawes

I can't find my coat
oh wait. There it is where I
left it yesterday

 

@DorcasDarling

Have you seen my keys?
I left them on the table
Never mind - found them

@flup

where is page twenty?
maybe after page nineteen
oh yes there it is



@garethesque

This pen has no ink
so I can't write anything
oh, here's a new one

 

@he1enbe11

This is out of date
But I think it smells okay
I guess I'll risk it

@he1enbe11

Clink. Clink.
Recycling collection. Shit!
Haven't put mine out!

@jfderry

knock knock who is there?
I said, knock knock who is there?
hello? hello? uh?

@jfderry

[insert 1st line here]
[insert 2nd line here]
[insert 3rd line here]

@kathyclugston

I like my eggs fried
but sometimes I have them poached
or even scrambled

 

@laurashav

For lunch I might have
A cheese and pickle sandwich
If there's enough cheese

@laurashav

Remember that girl
What did she say about Greg?
Oh no you weren't there



@Lisekit

A frog on a lily
did not jump into a pond
He made no splash. None

@martylog

Where are my car keys?
I could have sworn I put them...
Oh wait there they are.

@mcquickdraw

I'm looking for trains
They have different numbers
I've got no girlfriend

@mrchrisaddison

These spuds taste great love.
Did you do something different?
I just used duck fat.

 

@mrchrisaddison

I saw a lady
Who looked like Anne Widdecombe
Until she turned round

@mrchrisaddison

I think our neighbour
Has put his bins out early
Let's ring the council.

@NEILUSMAXIMUS

Have you seen my phone?
Susan, I can't find my phone
Oh, it's in my hand

@ners1977

My move on Scrabble
A A I I I U V
I'll exchange my tiles

 

@studentnurse

Nurses jobs include
Saving lives and other things
Like clearing up shit

 

@tomregan

We've checked your account
You haven't had a review
Would you like one now?

 

@unfortunatalie

Have you seen my hat?
It isn't on the coat peg
Oh I've got it on